不懂从什么时候开始,我就找不到任何理由爱家人了。
不知道为什么,痛恨全涌上心里。我开始慢慢的恨他们
不晓得什么因素,我开始变了;忘不了一切的伤痛。
你知道吗?我真的受够了。
不知道为什么别人的家可以那么幸福美满,我的却不可以。
自从弟弟出生以后,爸爸妈妈都变了。
我渐渐的不再信任他们,不爱他们了。
口口声声说自己没有偏见,而明明就有。
你们以为我是不懂事的三岁小孩吗?
为什么好好的会变化成这个样子?
今年发生了数不清的事情,你们从来没有安慰过我。
被人家欺负的感觉如何?要默默的忍受有多委屈?
弟弟做错事,是我承担。为什么?我都很不耐烦了。
有几次我再房间锁上门,哭了一整夜?
今年我非常遗憾;后悔一件事,是被逼到疯狂的后果;
我割伤了自己的腿,是很深的,留了无数的血。
我却什么痛都感觉不到。到如今那深深的疤痕。
一点小事都吼我,让自己感到好不自在。
我今年也赢了一些奖品,你门有奖励;鼓励;称赞过我妈?
我英文;华文考上优秀的成绩,你们的反应是什么?
那你有笨有坏的儿子,一年级,三个C, 一个B,连一个A都没有
你们还不是买了无数的礼物,什么都成全他?!
我在你们眼里是什么,真的那么失败吗?
这一切隐瞒了一阵子,被蒙在鼓里的你们感觉如何?
生活在大人的谎言中很辛苦,很痛心。
你们一次又再一次的彻底伤害我。
难道你们察觉不出来吗?我是你们的孩子,在这里流泪。
谁都不可以告诉。
别人有可靠的父母听他们诉苦,我又谁?
无影无中的你们?
你们知道我到底是否还把你们当成一家人吗?!?!
What's the qualities parents ought to have? I'm forbidden to cry.
Why? Everybody has their own emotions, I can't let it off-stream.
Do you think we leave in a fairy tale world? Ain't you aware of the realistic world?
Because of your actions, I'm this dead person;
That turns to slashing myself and crying so often.
I don't want to grow up. I hate Xavier. I hate Daddy. I hate Mummy.
If you really hate me soo much, then well.
I'll leave the home....
AND DISAPPEAR BEFORE YOUR VERY EYES.
This morning...
I merely asked my mother why is my brother watching TV again? Every day.
Breakfast, lunch, dinner. Eyes glued to the television set.
And she scolded me. And called me 小气鬼.
Must I teach her the definition of 小气, so inappropriate to use it here. Tsssssk.
Then she went on scolding me, while my brother gave me that smirk.
Afterall, watching so much BEN 10, does it pull up his grades?
No, almost failed. Character, attitude sucks. Answer back at my mother.
And she don't care! How old is he? 7!
When I do that, my parents glare at me, confiscate my stuff. WhattheFUCK!
And despite having this injured knee, I have to bear her grudges.
And wash shoes, and bent down washing, and my knee was throbbing.
Can I cry? NO!
Now I'm her servant. Constantly nags at me, scolds me.
My heart is so broken. And I'm crest-fallen. I can't blink away the tears forming at my eyes
forming every second; every minute.
And tonight, she's going to complain to my father. Who will immediately side her.
And it will start. Arguments. And my mother will scold me, hit me.
Push practically all the blame to me.
I'm just a punching bag at home for them.