有伤痕的爱那么重盖
Sunday, November 8
08-November-2009; 7.37pm珊瑚海-周杰伦
30 more days to YOG opening ceremony.
Physics remedial and dance practice tomorrow.
Dance: 8, 9, 11, 12 this week :(
I wonder what's wrong with me. Mood swings are so severe I can practically be euphoric now and break down into tears and all the happiness fade away the next minute. And I've been experiencing it for the whole week I think it's seriously interfering in my business-.-'' Well, dance practices are so hectic and is wearing me out. I've only got 1 day off from dancing this following week. I'm kinda expecting myself to break down already. I only hope that after all the sacrifices we dancers make, the outcome would be desired and nice.
Daddy force me go ballet yesterday when my whole body was aching from intense modern dance practices. I almost cried, because I was already in serious pain and I realize that daddy actually loves money more than my health. So endured the pain and went for ballet. But piles hurt me like crazy, and the barre work was like slacked throughout. Had to do splits, and teacher forced me into full splits, and my whole leg was numb by the time I stood up 15 minutes later:( Then in the last 30 minutes, Gina sabo me never come I alone T.T and teacher especially had eagle eyes, feel like I couldn't even place one finger wrongly. Was pressing me on the verge of tears. Did piles again, and I really couldn't bend anymore, so stood up and teacher scold me for stopping halfway. Then centre was worst, I was in that much pain and I forget half the steps or didn't pointe leg or whatever kept on repeating until I was really battered. And then after class I went to the toilet crying and throwing a temper, asking and questioning myself if this was really what I want. No doubts, I love dancing, but dancing everyday is really asking too much, the dancers rest on saturday and sunday while I have to slog my guts out still. Wiped my tears dry and walked out of toilet.
Today daddy bring me go buy new phone, the stupid W595 spoilt for the third time, so bought T700!(: Pink colour also!:D And bought one more pair of tights for dance. Yesterday night I cried like crazy before sleeping. I could not even walk, except limp. The pain in my thigh was excruciating, even touching it seems like jabs of knives stabbing into it. So I cried myself to sleep. And morning woke up, feeling a little better. Can't blame me huh? Although I seem to almost hate dance now, I'm still a dancer, and if I were to stop dancing now because of injuries sustain when it's only 1 month due before the major performance representing SJC and Singapore, I think I will 抓狂发疯. I guess you people out there know dancing is really this tough, and not just wearing pretty pink shoes and tutu(s) swirling around. The hard work behind is gruesome and tough.
I bet you all have never seen those pretty pointe shoes wear out in the nasty state huh? I randomly got both pictures off the net, but look.( Copyrighted, msn.com ) Compare both pictures, what people see are the beautiful images. Look closely at the blisters and plasters bandaged around the ballerina's toes. This is exactly how we are like. After all the blood, we have to still go on pointe. It hurts, definitely. So in the end, who will appreciate and congratulate us? Daddy? Mummy? No.
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